An Amazing Italian Restaurant in New Jersey

I am thankful for all the blessings that God has thrown my way.  I feel very blessed to have a great: family, church, friends, and a vision in life to die for.  A man couldn’t want more, but just recently another blessing has been thrown my way.  I’m not sure if it’s from God, ok, it probably isn’t, but nonetheless, I want to give him praise.

Many who know me, understand my passion for food.  I love to eat, and being in Italy for almost two weeks in August, brought joy to my heart a.k.a stomach because of all the  amazing authentic Italian food my palette was exposed to.

One of my missions was to come home and find an authentic Italian restaurant.  No offense to the Olive Garden, Macaroni Grill, and Maggianos lovers, but it ain’t authentic Italian food.  Any true Italian will tell you that.

So as fortune would have it, while in my pursuit to find an authentic Italian restaurant, two blocks away from my home, a new Italian Restaurant called Fontana di Trevi opened.  Fontana di Trevi is located on 248-252 Fort Lee Road, Leonia, NJ 07605.  Yes, you read right, there is an authentic Italian restaurant in Leonia, NJ.  My palette is still sensitive enough to spot the real authentic taste of Italian food that I so much enjoyed in Italy.  I have been there two times in three days.  What can I say, when I love something, I keep going back.

Last night, I brought a few friends with me to see what they thought of the food, and they loved it.

I haven’t tried many of the dishes but here are the ones that I ordered and loved: Calamari, Penne Vodka, Penne in Spicy Tomato Sauce (warning this is really spicy), Ravioli with Mushroom, Linguine with sweet and spicy sausage(this was a special for the day), and Salad di Trevi.  For dessert we had a chocolate soufflé and pear tart, which were both really good.  My wife ordered the Mahi Mahi and it was ok.  I realized that when at this restaurant just stick with the pasta.

Also to note that the price is a bit expensive.  A bowl of pasta will run you $14-$16.  The portions are small, which makes it even more authentic Italian.  When I was in Italy, the portions were much smaller than American standards.  So if you are a big eater order two bowls of pasta, or go to another restaurant.  This place is about the quality over the quantity.

If you are in the mood for an authentic Italian restaurant then please try Fontana di Trevi. Call them for a reservation 201.242.9042.  You won’t be disappointed.

U2 Concert at Giants Stadium

Yesterday, Stephen Sharkey, Koo Chung, Scott Kwak, and I went to the U2 concert.  It was my first U2 concert ever!  To be honest, I’m not into concerts, especially ones that are this large in scale.  The main reason why is because of the crowd and traffic.  Being an introvert doesn’t help as well.  But for U2, I made an exception.

One of my lifetime goals was to attend a U2 concert, and now I have fulfilled that goal.  It was a great show and I’m thankful that I was able to go with friends from Metro.  I don’t know if I’ll ever go to another U2 concert because this one is going to be hard to beat.  We were so close to the stage, I was able to take some great photos of the band.  Enjoy them!

No Religion in America

Yesterday’s issue of USA Today reported that 15% of Americans contend that they have no religious affiliation.  22% of the people from ages 18-29 say they have no religious affiliation.  Is spirituality dying in America?  Or is it just the institution of religion that is dying?  The study further concludes that some of the people who are not affiliated with a religious group actually believe in God.  Experts report that in the not to distant future, there will be more people in America that have no religious affiliation than those that do.  The leading religious institution in America is Catholicism, which comprises of 24% of Americans.

Why do you think Americans do not want to be affiliated with a religious institution?  Is it a spiritual thing or an institution thing?  How do you think the church should respond?

I Struggle with Faithfulness

One of the things that I struggle with is the desire to be faithful in every area of my life.  You might be thinking that is a good thing, but I beg to differ.  I’m realizing that my desire to want to be faithful is connected to my desire for success.  The reason why this is dangerous is because having self-confidence can lead to a lack of focus and sometimes depression when you fail.  Many of us become depressed or lose passion to live life because our self-confidence was not prepared for failure.  And when we fail, we lose focus and the discipline to live life.  God teaches us that we must find our confidence in Him, rather than in ourselves.  Our self-confidence hinders us from depending on God’s strength.

In the past few weeks, I’ve been struggling with my unfaithfulness.   I’ve been feeling unfaithful in the area of not: reading enough, praying enough, and exercising enough.

I’ve been unfaithful as a husband by not appreciating Jenny enough.  I realize how blessed I am to have a wife who completely supports my call to ministry, even if it means working a full-time job, raising the kids by herself while I am away traveling, or in a church meeting, and hosting many church events in our home.

I have been unfaithful as a father by getting easily hot tempered with Christina (my oldest daughter) because she doesn’t understand her third grade homework.

Sometimes, I wonder how God is holding things together in my life.  Then a few days ago, I read a passage that ministered deeply to me: 2 Timothy 2:13: “If we are unfaithful, he remains faithful, for he cannot deny who he is.” 2 Timothy 2:13 breathed life into my soul because God is the one holding things together.  Even when I am unfaithful, God is faithful because he cannot deny who he is.  God is always faithful no matter how unfaithful I can be.

So the next time you think you are not being faithful as a spouse, leader in the church, and in your relationship with God, please understand that in the midst of your unfaithfulness, God will be faithful.  This truth should actually give us energy and a focus to be a better husband, father, pastor, leader, and child of God.  The energy and focus comes from our confidence in God and not in ourselves.  This is the kind of faithfulness that God desires for you and me.

The Importance of Thinking Gray

It has been said that a good leader must be able to make important decisions quickly.  As you lead your church, or workplace, how many times have people come up to you for an answer to an important decision making scenario?  It has happened to me countless of times, and my first instinct is to make a decision right there on the spot.  I think many of us are tempted to think that the speed of our decision is more important than making the right decision.  How many times have we regretted a decision made in haste?

I’ve been reading Steven Sample’s book: The Contrarian’s Guide to Leadership.  It has been a fascinating read that has helped me to think counter intuitively about leadership, especially in the area of decision making.  One of the things that he teaches in the book, is to take your time when making an important decision.  He says: “A truly effective leader, however, needs to be able to see the shades of gray inherent in a situation in order to make wise decisions as to how to proceed.”  The essence of thinking gray is “don’t form an opinion about an important matter until you’ve heard all the relevant facts and arguments, or until circumstances force you to form an opinion without recourse to all the facts.”  The reason for this is that when a leader forms an opinion too soon, then what happens is that he or she will become close minded to facts and arguments that may subsequently come to his or her attention later.  Sample goes as far as to say that it is best to wait as long as possible until you can’t wait no more to make a decision.  The right decisions usually come to those who are able to wait patiently.  Therefore, don’t be tempted to make a quick decision.

Sample also comments that it is important we allow others in our organization to make important decisions, and when it is the wrong decision, we take full responsibility for it.   I was able to do this with someone on my staff today.  A pastor came into my office and asked for my advice if they should purchase something for their ministry. Financially, we have felt the pinch as a church because of the economy.  So naturally before making a sizeable purchase for the church, this person wanted my approval.  I told him, “I trust you to make the right decision so it’s your call.”  He was shocked to hear this because in the past, I would tell him what to do.  When your staff knows that you trust their decision making process, it gives them a moral boost.

Think gray when making an important decision.  The worst thing you can do is make a decision prematurely, and then have to change that decision later because it was the wrong one.  You begin to lose credibility as a leader.  So the next time you are faced with an important decision, think gray and it will probably save you a couple of sleepless nights.

Ten Year Anniversary in Italy

Today is day four of our trip to Italy.   Jenny and I, are celebrating our ten year anniversary!  Yes, it has been a long time, but I can honestly say that it has been the best ten years of my life.  We decided to celebrate our anniversary in one of the most romantic and beautiful places in the world: Italy.  We flew into Rome on Saturday and visited the Coliseum, Vatican, Spanish Steps, Fountain of Trevi, and Piazza Venezia.  Rome is a beautiful city – the history and rich architecture of its buildings, the amazing Mosaics hanging on the sacred walls of Saint Peter’s Basilica, and the beautiful art work of Michael Angelo’s paintings (Sistine Chapel was the bomb!) and his divinely inspired sculptures made even a not very “art savvy” person like me stand in awe.  Rome was beautiful.

But that was not the highlight of our trip.  Today, Jenny and I took an express rail to Florence.  As soon as we touched ground in Florence, we got on a tour bus and hit the country side of Tuscany, which is known as Italy’s wine country: Chianti.  We visited a few wineries in the area tasting the best Chianti wines in the world.  I had never had Chianti wine before, but it is now my favorite wine.  I really appreciate the dry taste of Chianti wines.

What I loved about Chianti was not only the wine, but the magnificent country landscapes.  As I am getting older, I am falling more in love with the country/rural areas, rather than the hustle and bustle of urban centers.  The beautiful villas and castles that were built 500-700 years ago, allowed me to get a foretaste of what life was like back then.  Chianti, is still a rural town where the advances of technology have not corrupted this majestic place.  There was a part of me that wanted to live in Chianti.

Legend has it that Mona Lisa lived in the villa on the left.

The highlight for me was having dinner in Chianti.  Yes, as many of you know, I travel primarily for good eats.  I love food.  Our tour bus had 16 other people from all over the world.  They were all extremely friendly people.  We went to a local restaurant called “Antica Trattoria La Toppa.”  The food was amazing.  The best Italian food I had ever eaten.  It was a five course meal!  We started with a penne pasta dish covered in a meaty tomato sauce.  Then they brought out fettuccine with spicy tomato sauce, which was our favorite dish.   Next, they brought out wild boar (pork) with herbs and species, topped with extra virgin olive oil.  Oh I forgot to mention, Chianti is also home of the best extra virgin olive oil in the universe.  The fourth course was sausage and beans in a red sauce.  And we finished our meal with their homemade Tiramisu.  I just can’t describe how great of a meal this was for us.  I wanted to take pictures, but the battery on our camera ran out.

The other great part of the meal was the company.  The people we went with were wonderful people.  I had a very interesting conversation with a man from the UK.  His name is Stephan.  Stephan was very opinionated about his view of God and the church.  He was a wealth of knowledge on the history of the world, particularly church history.  We had an interesting conversation about spiritual matters, politics, and the corruption of the church.  I agreed with some of the things he had to say about the church. I realized again how THE CHURCH has messed up, and unfortunately, the repercussions still have a negative impact on people today.  It was a deep conversation that I thank God for allowing me to experience.  The really neat thing is that we are planning to connect again over dinner tomorrow.  I guess our deep conversation will continue.

So far, this trip to Italy has been one Jenny and I will never forget.  It has been a great way to celebrate our ten year anniversary.  We do however miss our kids and the folks back at Metro, but we love every minute of Italy.  Ciao!

Courageous Leadership Award

Last week, at the WillowCreek Leadership Summit, Metro Community Church and Zimele was awarded the Courageous Leadership Award.  It was a humbling experience, but one that was well deserved for all of the great work Zimele is doing.  The Leadership Summit has a huge audience of over 100,000 people.  The exposure has been great for Zimele.  Needless to say, there have been a number of churches that have contacted us with a desire to partner with Zimele.

A special thanks to Rosetta Heunis who is the founder and Executive Director of Zimele.  Rosetta, without your vision and passion for the least, the last, and the lost, Zimele would be nothing.  Ron Kwak, who helped launch Zimele on the US side, A special thanks for devoting thousands of hours to fund raising and handling the day to day operations as Director of Zimele USA.  Sean Lee, thank you for stepping up as the acting Director of Zimele USA and creating opportunities for Zimele that I only dreamed about.

One of my great joys in life is when you get the right people together so that a vision can come alive.  Zimele started out as a vision – a dream that needed to come alive becuase millions of lives are at stake, and in two and a half years, we are making an impact in Kwazulu Natal, South Africa.  We are helping people in South Africa to realize that they can get out of poverty on their own.

We had lunch with Bill Hybels who is the Senior Pastor of WillowCreek Church.  Bill was impressed and shocked to learn that Zimele can help the poor in South Africa get out of poverty without any finanical support.  His exact words were: “How can you do that when they have no money?  Don’t we have to give them a micro loan?”  I shared with him that as an individual it will be impossible for the poor to get out of poverty in Africa, but if you get 20 women together, and give them the right structure and accountability to come together every week and submit their few pennies into a community savings account – that each person in the group has the responsibility to oversee, then it is possible.  We have seen savings groups generate enough income where people are starting businesses.  Not only are they able to pay for their own food, school fees and uniforms for their kids or grandchildren, they are able to take out a loan from that savings group and start a business.  Bill, was very impressed.

Zimele is on the move.  I’m grateful that God would allow Metro to partner with an organization like Zimele. Rosetta, will be in the US in October to meet up with church leaders and business leaders. If you would like to learn more about Zimele and possibily partner with us, please visit us at our website Zimele, or you can simply email Sean Lee at sean.s.lee@gmail.com.

Here is the video of the Courageous Leadership Award: .

Finding Love in Unexpected Places

Metro is currently in its summer sermon series called: God on Film.  Each week, we look at a summer blockbuster movie, and dissect the theological lessons from it.  We also correlate it to a story in the Bible.  This past Sunday, I spoke on the film: The Proposal, starring Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds. Here is the link if you want to listen to the sermon.

One of the points that I touched upon in the sermon is that there is a direct link to our respect for God and our respect for people.  Meaning, to the degree that we show respect for people, including folks who disappoint us, is the level of respect we are showing to God.

This really takes form when you are in a marriage relationship, and you lose or have lost all sense of respect for your spouse.  When you lose respect for your spouse, then it is difficult to experience love from them.  Love can only be experienced when there is respect.  If you do not respect someone, then it makes it nearly impossible for you to experience love from them.

In the same way, if a spouse respected God, then they would heed the words of Paul found in Ephesians 5:22-33.  Often because we do not respect God, we take the liberty of doing the opposite of what the Bible teaches us to do.  In addition, because we do not respect God, we are unable to experience his love for us.  Our respect for God is a reflection of our respect for people, and vice versa.

This is true of people who are bitter.  I have counseled people who have gone through some terrible storms in their life.  Some of them have allowed God to minister to them, and they have matured into incredibly wonderful deep people.  The other group of people is often bitter and blames God for what has happened to them.  The root to the bitterness is their lack of respect for God.  If they respected God, then they would be able to experience his healing love and grace.

If you want God to minister his love and grace over the tragic that has been a part of your life, then you need to respect Him.  Our respect for God grows as we respect other people, even those who disappoint us.

Sushi Buffet in Portland

In the past year, Sushi has really become one of my favorite types of food.  I always liked sushi but it was never my favorite cuisine.  My favorite Sushi restaurant is Sushi Cruise in Edgewater, NJ.  I know it may not be the best sushi, but it is affordable and it has a killer view of Manhattan.  Sushi Cruise use to have a $1 per plate lunch special, but now they raised it to $1.50 per plate.  I obviously do not go there as much anymore.

I’ve been in Portland, Oregon for the past three days for a pastor’s conference.  Today, Eugene Cho, Brenda Salter McNeil and I went to Todai’s for lunch.  It was the second time I had eaten at this all you can eat sushi buffet.  The last time I had eaten at Todai was when I was in LA back in my seminary days.  Todai was always the place to eat good not great sushi.  I have to honestly say that the sushi was not very good.  It was average at best.  The best Sushi buffet that I have been to is Minados in NJ.  The quality of the sushi is much better at Minados, and they have a much larger spread.

If you know a place to eat good sushi please share.

Leadership Gut Check

John Maxwell taught many of us the concept of “failing forward.”  It is a concept that I have taken to heart and often times comforted me when I have failed in leadership.  If you are a leader, while there are lessons to be learned in our failures, failing really sucks.  There really is no other way to put it.

However over the years as I’ve lead Metro, I have run across leaders who have failed, and that failure literally incapacitated them.  For weeks, or even months, a leader would be depressed or lose motivation to ever lead again.  Those are of course extreme cases, but I hope you can jive with the fact that failing leaves a long lasting residue of brokenness that sometimes we as leaders don’t pay enough attention to.  If you continue to ignore it then what happens is that it later becomes a form of narcissism.  Let me explain.

One thing that many of us have in common is that we suffer from low self-esteem.  Some try to be over confident to compensate for their low self-esteem.  Some suffer less from it than others.  But fail a couple of times and it will begin to affect your self worth.  What happens to many of us is that once we fail in leadership, that failure impacts us in such a way where the focus is primarily on us and not on the ministry or organization that we are leading.  Because we have low self-esteem, the failure pushes us in a corner where we no longer focus or even care about what is best for the ministry or organization that we are leading.  It becomes all about us and this is why it becomes a form of narcissism.

For example, at the beginning days of Metro, there were times where I felt like I dropped the ball in preaching.  I felt like my sermon didn’t go as well as I had planned.  I would go home feeling defeated and it would at times lead to days of depression.  What it did was put me in this funk where I didn’t want to preach anymore and I struggled to have the motivation to pray and work even harder so that the next sermon I preached, would be better received.  The focus was on me and not the church anymore.  I had lost for a few days the capacity to lead Metro.  Luckily, I was able to reflect and learn from this vicious cycle that I see many good leaders struggle with.  It is not easy to lead a ministry or an organization when you feel like a failure.

How do we get out of this funk?  The only antidote is to do a LEADERSHIP GUT CHECK.  What is a leadership gut check?  It’s about asking yourself a few questions and answering them with raw honesty.

First question is: “Did I do my best?”

Failing while trying is a good thing, but failing while not trying is inexcusable.   What you have to ask yourself is “did I do my best?”  Did I give it my best shot?  All that is required of you is your effort, and if you have put forth a valiant effort then you can hold your head up high and move on.  This is how you fail forward.

Lebron James is a good example.  After losing to the Orlando Magic, he failed to shake hands with Dwight Howard and the rest of the team.  He also didn’t show up for the press conference after the game.  His excuse was that he wasn’t feeling it – that he is a winner and when he doesn’t win he can’t shake someone’s hand.  As great as Lebron James is, he still has a ways to go before he develops into a mature leader.  Lebron James failing to go to the NBA Finals became more about him than about the well being of the Cleveland Cavilers.

Second question is: “Am I taking responsibility for the failure?”

Taking responsibility for a failure helps you to assess and learn from it.  If you don’t take responsibility for a failure and you try to blame it on someone or something else, then you won’t be able to learn the nuggets of wisdom that failure has to offer you.

Third question is: “Who do I need to talk to?”

It is always good to talk to someone you trust like a mentor or accountability partner and share your failure.  Often times they will give you a perspective that will help you.

Fourth question is: “How can this failure help me to grow?”

It takes a confident person to learn from their failures.  Each failure has the opportunity to build up your self-confidence if you can grow from it.  Please understand that failure is the prelude to success.  You cannot be successful unless you have failed.  The great Michael Jordan once said: “I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”

If you are a Christian, you can take comfort in the fact that God’s strength is perfected in our weakness.  So to experience God’s power working at its maximum capacity in our life, we must be weak (2 Corinthians 12:9).  Why is that the case?

When you read the Bible, there is a theological thread that teaches us: God’s grace presupposes barrenness.  God’s grace works most powerfully in our barrenness or our nothingness.  Why did the Lord wait until Moses was eighty years old, a failure and fugitive, with no possibilities?  Why did the barren womb of Sarah represent the barrenness that allows God’s grace to work most powerfully?  Because the element of human possibility must be removed in order for God’s grace to work.  Moses was chosen to be the redeemer because he was also without power on the human level.  Moses understood that this ‘powerlessness’ is itself a necessary ingredient in the chemistry of divine grace.  The grace of God must first kill before it can make alive.  The grace of God requires barrenness, not our own belief, as a precondition.  True faith and true obedience come as a gift of God’s grace.

If this is true, then a failure can be the perfect landscape for God to pour out his grace in our life.  In God’s economy, a failure can free you from narcissism and lead you to experience God’s grace in an amazing and refreshing way.  This is how we learn and grow from our failures.

So the next time you fail, please conduct a leadership gut check, and may you be on your way to greater growth.